I have not been a good poster, nor commenter lately, its just that everyday my life is changing and I am not able to keep up. Also I have been fighting with being a little bit mad at God.
I will divide this post in 3 parts which are the ones that are taking up most of my life right now. Health, work and adoption.
I will start with the bad and end with the good! If you want skip the first part and go straight into the adoptin part.
Since September my health has been pretty beat up. The last 5 months of my life have been HORRIBLE in this respect. And I am mad. Cannot help it.
After the antibiotics given to me by Dr H in January my TEBB disappeared (had TEBB for the very 1st time in my whole life), but I began to experience some mild symptoms of a yeast infection which went away after I took some OTC medicines.
I was on extremely high doses of probiotics to try not to get yeast, but still I think my body was not ready for so many medicines one after the other..
Well....the TEBB was gone, but then then the symptoms of yeast came back with a vengance and tons of pain and itchiness. So being me I went straight to the lab and decided to do a vaginal test for yeast and other things last Monday without even asking.
I could feel it within me that something was way off again.
Well... my health ordeal is not over.
I indeed had a yeast infection which needed medications, but also another infection.
Yep., another one.
One that attacks many times weakened people in hospital settings, for which I have been on another beautiful course of antibiotics in this case Bac.trim Fo.rte. Reading Dr. google it really sounds scary so i have stopped googling and trusting the doctors.
My stomach is definetly destroyed. The only good thing is that I have been losing weight since I have been nauseous for one week now.
The beautiful bug is called: klebsiella pneumonaie. yep. its a bug that if you get it in your lungs you get pneumonia.
Well this amazing bug is quite resistant so the doctor decided to give me a very strong 7 day round of Bac.trim in its strongest form, plus a medicine for the yeast infection. Everyday I take so many pills that I had to invest in another pill holder, one for people over 65!
And do not get me started what this has done to our love life. The last FIVE months it has been mostly non existant. My DH is a saint. Truly.
Ultra heavy bleeding, continous bleeding, TEBB, yeast, infections, D&Cs ,miscarriage, polyps, Continous Pasty with itching, vaginal pain. I think in the 5 months maybe 2 weeks I have been symptom free of anything.
A week ago when I found about this new infection I got mad.
This is one of the reasons I was not posting. I remembered St. Teresa De Avila´s words to God: If this is the way you treat your friends, no wonder you have so few.
Well this is exactly how I felt. I am sorry, but its the reality. I was working my ### off for Na-Pro and my prac-titioner program giving both all my nights, weekends and money and then this happens. I did not want to be given a prize for my work, but also not what seemed like a horrible punishment or some type of test of faith.
Was I supposed to live every disease a woman can have in my own flesh? I mean I have seen my chart change from perfect to a disaster.
I do not know. I felt it all was a very cruel joke. God asked me for my baby, after fighting like crazy agains IF... but not only this. It had to be with also extreme physical pain, bleeding, complications, a second D&C in less than 3 months thinking that it was another baby, infections that nobody gets. I mean why, why, why? I am sorry, but my human side wins here.
I am better now and need to retest in a week to see if they both went away. Also do an U/S to see how everything is doing after 2 D&Cs so close together. But still I am somewhat mad when I look at my chart and take some 15 pills a day.
Please pray that I am sent home to have a normal life soon after the tests come back. My DH, my stomach and my heart would really be thankful!
I have been offered more responsabilities and a great growth opportunity... Yep. In the middle of all of this and our adoption process.
Yesterday my counterpart approached me telling me if I would be interested in him recommending me for his postion (he does the content and I do the communication and marketing of it for Latin-america). We work all projects hand in hand.
this in addition to my current one. In several regions they are putting both areas under one person for better coordination and his move would make this the very best solution.
He is moving to another region and has been asked to name a succesor. It seems neither HR, nor him nor my boss think any of his team is ready for the postion and they want a person already involved. From most of the managers I am the only one with real marketing and team management experience.
This would mean that I would have a huge team and control of most of the budget of the region. 7 managers, plus 3 more employees and 5 agencies in Brasil and Mexico. 2 areas under one person.
Something that does not fit with my life plans, but at the same time the money would be very welcome as my DH situation is still not good.
My priorities are: My family, health and napro. In this order.
So most probably I will decline, but its so very interesting at the time this comes. Some 6 months ago I probably would have said yes without even blinking.
Also I just negotiated maternity leave (3 months! which is the same as maternity leave in case of pregnancy) and flex time for our adoption.i also have 1 month vacation so I can be home 4 months! Fully enganged and commited to our baby.
Mexico still does not have a law for maternity leave in case of adoption (its in congress right now) so I totally depended on my boss and HR. Well they came through in a way that I did not expect. A light of rain in the midst of my health woes!
The same benefits and time as biological maternity (its even better than the law that is right now in congress) and they have written this in the companies policies.
And at the very same time this job offer. Not sure what the message is.
Things are moving very fast right now. We just finished the course this Monday and graduated. It was a very moving day. We were able to visit from afar the agency´s nursery, it was filled!!
They had 22 babies, most in the process of being adopted, waiting for the right parents or the biological mothers signature.
We could not see most since they were in their cribs and sleeping and we had a window separating us to protect the babies from infections, but it was amazing.
Just 2 babies were near enough to be seen. It might well be that in there were the babies of part of our group so there were a lot of tears.
We also visited the chapel which is right in the middle of our agency. I was so very excited.
I love that God is center stage at our agency. Before placing the children they pray and go to Adoration to choose the best family for the baby. So very different form the governement agency in which a number makes the decision.
Most of the babies are given to their families in the middle of a mass to celebrate and give thanks in this very chapel.
DH and I prayed there for our own family and for all of you. It had an image of Our Lady of Guadalupe on one side of the altar and of St. Joseph on the other and we prayed to both.
The paper work continues. We need to prepare a lot of papers for our social worker vist. A detailed income sheet, how we spend our money, tons of receipts and then make a mini album of photos our house. The vist will be on the 10th this month. Its 2 hours long and evaluates everything from your work schedule, your living conditions and your economic situation.
Our file must have now over a hundred pages. wow!
Then after this is the doctors vist for an evaluation and the taking of blood tests for AIDS, TB and many others.
After this is the vist to the judges so we can have a certificate that states that we do not have jail time or issues with the law. Its exhausting!
And in a month more the 2nd part of our 10 hour psychological exam. With all of this our file is sent then to a committee inside the agency which pre approves and then they will present it to the governement adoption office and they will approve or not of us as being fit for adoption via a special document. Once this document is granted we are parents to be in the eyes of the law.
This means that if all goes OK we could have a baby placed with us the very next days after we have been granted this paper or in the next 6 months. The usual time right now at our agency is between one month and three. I cannot believe this as I write this.
It seems almost surreal in the middle of all that is going on.
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