Again after years of health with Napro.
I had long suspected it, but was in complete denial.
I had noticed that again I craved sugar and coffee like a mad woman and felt cloudy headed (not sure this is the correct expression in English, but basically I feel most of the day not present.)
This has been going on for months now, but has gotten worse in the last weeks and the last days have been such a struggle to even function.
My energy was very low, but I have always been able to manage, but the last 5 days have been hell.
But now there is no denying it.
Basically three medical systems have confirmed it.
- Napro via a high TSH even while on medication and via the return of my symptoms
- Then Traditional chinese medicine which I have been going to in the last 3 weeks in our efforts to conceive again. Basically the doctor (who is also trained in Western Medicine) without me even telling him told me I had Spleen chi and Kidney Yang deficiency which in Western terms all have to do with the thyroid, digestion, metabolism and adrenals. Basically a mess.
- And then SC.IO which I have blogged about that is a machine that measures the energy fields in the body (if you look it up there are tons of crazy people promoting it, but basically is grounded in great science. I learned about it from a medical doctor who is also a member of the Opus dei who explained to me where the science was and where the new age was. So its very very important to have a good practitioner doing it) . Well I went last week when I felt at my worst and also without me saying anything to the woman that does this she turned the screen to me last week and the words on the screen said it: metabolism, thyroid, etc and asked me point blank: "what is going on with your thyroid????" all screens signal a very, very bad case of hypothyroid.
My thyroid starting to give problems at this very time is not a good thing. Its actually soooo frustrating. I crave coffee, sugar, chocolate like a crazy woman and cannot think straight.
It might be well related to stress. I had been stable for years now, but all of what has been going on and me not resting enough most probably helped my symptoms return full force. The body does not lie.
So Sunday I decide to rest as much as I could. I woke up, prepared breakfast and then decided to nap when our son napped after playing with him. I could not even wake up to go to mass, later heated some things for lunch and ate only to tell my DH that I needed to rest again. My DH was soooo surprised and completely took over.
He had never in our more than 5 years of marriage seen me sleep so much. Then I wake up again and decide that I am too tired to do anything and head back to bed again. So unlike me.
In 2 days I need to test again and if again high TSH I will go on more T4 or if the doctor in the Gianna center told me she might do she will put me on Armour (which by the way does not exist here soooo again we start the asking anybody that we know of to bring it to Mexico)
So I after seeing this I decided to focus on my health a 100%, rest, eat very well, exercise, etc.
But right when I had made this decision my world turns upside down again
Today we received the paperwork to start our second adoption. The process has begun officially today. Wow.
This is great news and very as so blessed to be able to do it a second time, but it also means the race to produce tons and tons of updated documents has begun. Almost a full time job and we have 3 weeks to do all. And its the next weeks or they move us to end of next year
To say I feel overwhelmed is an understatement.
Also today on top of all I had a meeting with my boss.
I got many unexpected news. A person from our team probably will leave in the near future for personal reasons and might right now even be absent from work for a few weeks in the most difficult time of the year. I had no idea.
And we have one girl who helps out a great deal pregnant that will give birth soon and another member in maternity leave and she has several months to go. Since we are a very, very small team this has put the whole team in crisis mode.
But I got the shock of my life a few minutes later when he told me that most probably I will absorb her position into my area once she leaves and grow my team again and head 2 areas.
Basically I would head most of the marketing personnel in the Mexico office and move from an operative role into a more directive one. My boss would still be the top guy, but basically he is leaving all the decisions of my area to me and asking me to build a very strong team.
This is truly amazing amazing news in the professional sense, but it could not have come at a worse time in terms of my personal life (TTC full force, adoption proceedings, Josemaria needing me more and more and thyroid issues).
Its truly ironic.
I am not sure how to take the news. Of course I am flattered, but at the same time overwhelmed, not knowing who in the world I will manage. He told me he had complete trust in me which of course is great, but at the same time I have had a headache since he told me.
I knew this was a possibility in the future (one or 2 years), but this persons problems will probably move everything.
I know I am in a great position to do good things and already we have been able to help several very, very good organizations (prolife) with the resources at my hand, I see work as a way to sanctify myself and most importantly right now help support my family.
I know that God wants something from all of this, still.......
I want to head to the nearest bed and bury my head under the covers for the next weeks. Focus only on my family and my health, yet it seems impossible.
My great consolation that maybe God in his wisdom permitted my DH to be out of a job right now so he could be with our son most of the day. A gift in disguise.
This is the only thing that seems to be working right now.